Man in van in the middle of the gentile, literary capital of the UK: (shouting - could be heard from down the street) "DON'T YOU START THAT SHIT WITH ME - I'LL RIP YOUR FUCKIN' HEAD OFF"
Woman on phone to police (suspected car accident report): "Did I go after him? By the time I got to the bottom of my hill, he'd be half way to Hereford."
Woman on phone (very babyish voice): "Yes, I got my dog neutered!"
To be continued.........
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